'Trendy' is a scary word!

For most of my life I have never really cared much about what I look like. Yes, I want to be slim and beautiful, but I have never invested much effort into making this happen.

I have always worn what I feel comfortable in, done my hair and make up for a special occasion, and not paid much attention to what is 'trendy'.

Over the last six months or so I have been questioning how what I look like can affect how I feel about myself.

Now, I know you must be thinking, how self-centered, or self-involved does someone have to be to constantly be thinking about what they look like. I am not talking about big, significant changes, but rather little tweaks which can boost my confidence.

I have always been an advocate of people (not just women) putting time and effort into looking perfect every day and applaud those who do; it is just not for me.

Recently I have been making small changes to how I appear, not for the benefit of others, but to explore how this can affect my mood and contribute to general good mental health and well-being.

I have started paying attention to what I wear, buying clothes from stores I would never have shopped in before and trying to (very subtly) be aware of what is 'fashionable'.

I have also attended a make up class which my husband bought me for Christmas, and since then have been trying out different looks and working out what suits me.

In addition to this I got my hair dyed as a birthday present and since then have been trying to take better care of it, for example, not just using the cheapest shampoo I can find!

All of this has been helped by the fact that I happen to work with some beautiful, young, glamorous women who have been a wealth of knowledge and advice. I am constantly asking about seemingly mundane things like shampoo and eyeliner and I don't think they realise just how much they are actually helping me, not just with how I look but with how I feel about myself.

Since I have been taking more care with how I look and lost a bit of weight, I feel generally better about myself and more confident. I don't have to have a full face of make up and a head of perfect curls to feel good, but when I do put the effort in I have the confidence to post photos on social media and feel happy with how I look in them.

It is not just the physical changes which matter, but that glow which comes from inside.

I am smiling more.

I actually have some photos of myself which don't horrify me.

But most importantly, although I still don't really care what I look like most of the time, I have some tools which contribute to a healthy mind, which is going to make life better in general for me and my family.

This is a journey which I am still on. I am learning new things about my own mental health issues and about mental health in general all the time. Baby steps are steps in the right direction.